Laws are made in
our contemporary Society against parental disciplining at home and in School.
The Child Right movement and the activists say spanking children is bad because
it teaches them to be violent and hurts their self-esteem. Will disciplining
children hurt their self – esteem? Will it make them rude and violent? What the
Word of God says in this regard? Let us find answers for these questions in the
light of the Scripture.
God, in His
revealed Word, said that “he who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves
him disciplines him promptly” (Proverbs 13:24). Further the Word of God
also gives us the reason why we need to begin disciplining our children
"Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; the rod of discipline
will remove it far from him (Proverbs 22:15)." Thus the “Rod of
discipline” is used to remove the foolishness that is bound up in the heart of
the child.
The Word of God
allows the parents to discipline their children however the parents should
understand the true meaning of disciplining before they discipline their
children. First, disciplining the Children is not mere beating or
inflicting pain on their body instead it is moulding and shaping them with
their unique talents and abilities to reflect the nature of God. It’s to make
the children to mature and reflect the character of Jesus as shown in the
bible. Second, Discipline is not something we do to our children;
it’s something we do for our children. Third, Discipline is a
moral correction which may include corporal punishment (Proverbs 22:15).
The “Rod of discipline” in Proverbs 22:15 has the idea of inflicting pain in
order to associate pain with wrong. The “Rod of discipline” will remove the
foolishness from the heart of a child when it is administered in God’s way with
the right motive. The right use of the “Rod of discipline” helps the children
to learn two simple yet essential facts: first, it helps them to understand
wrong brings pain second; it helps them to learn right brings affirmation. The
children will not die when they are spanked but the gentle and firm spank will
deliver their souls from the way of death.
The “Rod of
discipline” is unavoidable to save the children from the way of death however the
measure and mode of correction must depend upon the age, sex, and temperament, mental
and physical maturity of the child. The important point for the parents to
notice here is that their disciplining should be gracious like our Heavenly
Father's discipline, never more than the children can bear. The parents also
must be sure that disciplining of their children will surely bring them to repentance
and confession.
Let me conclude
my writing with the illustration to help the parents to know consequences when
their children are not disciplined according to God’s way. The poet Coleridge
was visited by a man who had a theory about raising children. He stated,
"I believe children should be given a free rein to think and act and thus
learn at an early age to make their own decisions. This is the only way they
can grow into their full potential." Coleridge made no comment but simply
led the man to his garden. "Come see my flower garden," he said. The
opinionated visitor took one look at the overgrown garden and remarked,
"Why, that's nothing but a yard full of weeds." The wise poet
declared, "It used to be filled with roses, but this year I thought I'd
let the garden grow as it willed without tending to it. This is the
result." Dear parents the “Rod of discipline” is necessary for the
proper maturing of your child. If you truly love your children you will
discipline them. God is the great example of parental love, yet He does not
spare the rod ... Hebrews 12:7.
Yours in His
service
G. Paul Raj
